When NOM’s mandatory heterosexuality tour stopped by Newark on Tuesday, Parents & Friends of Ex-Gays (PFOX) leader Greg Quinlan was on-hand to present the ex-gay position on heterosexual marriage: Desperate! “If you know of anybody, send them my way,” said Quinlan, who is totally straight now (and divorced). “I live right here in Roxbury Township, up in North Jersey. I’ll give you my name and number afterwords, if you know of anybody who’s available.” He then offered his criteria for a potential mate: “Female. And breathing.” Go get him, ladies!