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Chinatowns have been linked by bus lines for over a decade. The bus market has gotten more crowded in recent years, and now we have the so-called Hipster Express from U Street to Atlantic Terminal (now unpolluted by Manhattan!). But why stop there? Ours is an age of convenience. For you transportation entrepreneurs, we have a few suggestions of identity-appropriate lines that would give you a competitive edge. For would-be New York-D.C. migrants, if you’re feeling unrepresented by our ideas, feel free to leave your desired routes in the comments.

(And yes, Frank Rich and other Washingtonians-turned-New York boosters, we know there’s just no comparison between the two cities. We don’t want to hear it.)

Analogous regions of New York City await! (Lydia DePillis)

  • Columbia Heights — Williamsburg: The Real Hipster Express
  • Golden Triangle — Midtown: The Dudes in Suits Line
  • Cleveland Park — Upper West Side: The Bagel Run (starts at now-closed Whatsa Bagel on Connecticut Avenue, terminates at Zabar’s)
  • Petworth — Flatbush: Special Caribbean Carnival line, only runs the weekend before July 4th (for the D.C. carnival) and around Labor Day (for the New York one)
  • Dupont Circle — Chelsea: The Rainbow Ride
  • Glover Park — Murray Hill: The Post-Collegiate Express
  • Bloomingdale — Fort Greene: The Baby Carriage
  • U Street — Harlem: The Busboys Bus
  • Penn Quarter — Tribeca: The Chain Store Chariot
  • Cato Institute (10th and Massachusetts) — Manhattan Institute (44th and Madison): Dork Bus, Right Wing Edition
  • Center for American Progress (15th and H) — CUNY Grad Center (35th and 5th): Dork Bus, Left Wing Edition