So Rep. Louie “Aspersions on My Asparagus” Gohmert (R-Texas) has introduced another D.C. retrocession bill. These things come up pretty regularly in Congress; this one, the District of Columbia-Maryland Reunion Act, would give the District back to Maryland, with the exception of a National Capital Service Area, which would remain under the jurisdiction of Congress.

The measure is unlikely to pass: As D.C. Shadow Senator Paul Strauss told HuffPost DC, “The two problems with retrocession are, one, we don’t want to go; two, they don’t want us back.”

But let’s humor the distinguished gentleman from Texas for a moment and consult a map of what the District Currently Known as Columbia would look like under his vision—-if for no other reason than that I took the time to make it.

No thanks, Mr. Gohmert.