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Y&H had just polished off a Ben’s half-smoke with chili — a spicy bite that disappeared way too fast — and decided to chase it with a cleverly rolled Curly W pretzel from the vendor roaming our section at Nats Park.

Man, was that a mistake.

If there is a worst pretzel at an American ballpark, I have yet to try it. This designer piece of pretzel dough is sweetened, so sweetened in fact you could almost mistake it for chewy funnel cake. My appetite was such that I ate at least one ascender, maybe two. But after I couldn’t wash the cotton-candy sweetness out of my mouth with several gulps of beer, I stopped and tossed that sucker under the seat.