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It’s budget season at the D.C. Council, which means it’s also time for Ward 3 Councilmember Mary Cheh‘s annual joke budget.
Among Cheh’s proposals:
- An “Eleanor Holmes Norton Office of Parking and Driving,” named in honor of the District government’s worst parker, to teach elected officials how to park legally.
- A dictionary for ex-U.S. Attorney Ron Machen, whose promise that “there’s there there” about Vince Gray‘s 2010 campaign hasn’t come to fruition. With a dictionary, Cheh writes, Machen can “finally determine where exactly is the there.”
- Changes to the D.C. Council structure, to make sure all that “Mayor [Muriel] Bowser‘s former staff and campaign aides” are employed.
- A duel between Bowser and attorney general Karl Racine in RFK Stadium.
There’s also a proposal for the D.C. Board of Elections—printed upside-down, naturally. Read the rest of it below, and if you don’t find it funny, Cheh suggests you smoke some newly legalized marijuana.
Photo by Darrow Montgomery