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The burning sensation in between your toes? Probably means you need to wear socks and wash better. But the electricity you feel in the air is because we’re a mere four hours out from curtain-time on the sixth Capital Fringe Festival’s opening salvo of shows!

The 22 Fringe offerings popping off this evening between roughly happy hour and primetime offer you puppets, maxi-pads and Moby Dick (with puppets). Here’re a few from which we’re expecting greatness, or at least notable weirdness.

Megan and David’s Original Low-Cost Creativity Workshop: Jo Firestone and Dylan Marron gave us the funniest show of last year’s Fringe, Ridgefield Middle School Talent Nite, picking up the Director’s Award for their trouble. We at Fringe & Purge would probably watch them read the Apple End User License Agreement. The fact they have a new 60-minute show for us is just the icing on the Apple End User License Agreement. (The Shop; 5:30 p.m.)

Logic, Luck and Love: This is like applying to a safety school. The four storytellers performing this—-Jennifer Moore, John Kevin Boggs, Molly Kelly and Dustin Fisher —-are all seasoned Speakeasy DC veterans, so this is a poor specimen of the sort of apeshit stuff we at Fringe & Purge would encourage you to pursue. But hey, not everyone is the betting type. Rest assured: The probability this will suck is almost nil. (Wonderbox; 6 p.m.)

On the Rag to Riches: The ability to read a room is the performer’s bestest, truest friend. At the Fringe preview event last Friday, fourth-time-Fringe-performer, first-time-producer Katie Molinaro was one of the few on the bill seemed to understand that subtlety does not play in the Baldacchino Gypsy Tent. Fronting an all-female rock quartet—-which, right there, amounts to pandering to this particular Fringe & Purge-erer’s disposition at least as much as calling your show Who Killed Captain Kirk? does—-Molinaro sang a song from the new musical on which she collaborated with The Horrors of Online Dating composer/playwright Shawn Northrip. It’s about one woman’s relationship problems, apparently. On a possibly related note, she stuck a maxi-pad to the back of the stage on her way out. All’s fair in love and Fringe. (Baldacchino Gypsy Tent; 6:30 p.m.)

Tactile Dinner Car: How it took so long for the world to produce a theatrical adaptation of Filippo Tommaso Marinetti‘s 1932 Futurist Cookbook is beyond us, but this elaborate, food-truck-and-Buckminster Fuller-inspired restaging of a piece banished? productions first performed at the ’09 Fringe is hands-down the most inventive item on tonight’s Fringe menu. You don’t just watch this show; you taste it, too. Literally. They make you eat stuff. (Baldacchino Gypsy Tent; 7:30, 7:45 and 8 p.m.)

e-Geaux (beta): Social media celibates will want to give this one a wide berth. But if you’re one of those folks who won’t accept that it happened until you’ve updated your Bookface profile about it, then you’re probably game for this product-demo-as-performance, wherein mobile app developer Pepys, Inc.—-an out that includes CapFringe vets Amy Couchoud and Joseph Price-—promises to create a unique, made-to-order performance culled from audience members’ social media data. If you go, make sure to tell us whether that’s as sinister as it sounds. (Goethe Instituit Mainstage, 8 p.m.)