We know D.C. Get our free newsletter to stay in the know.

Recommendations of Capital Fringe shows being performed on this very night from the slightly-trained-but-highly-reliable agents of your friendly neighborhood Fringe & Purge Action News and Commentary Squad.

To Know a Veil (Warehouse, 6 p.m.)—-This is, unfortunately, your last chance to see Emma Crane Jaster’s evolving audience-participation dance piece, at least in this year’s Capital Fringe. It’s “a bit of everything: a little bit uncomfortable, a little bit funny, a little bit sexy, a little bit polemical,” observes Camila Domonoske. And you just might find yourself dressed in a loaner burka. Tickets.

The Agony and the Ecstasy of Steve Jobs: The Musical (Mt. Vernon United Methodist Church – Mountain, 6:15 p.m.)—-Mike Daisey’s controversial 2011 (rev. 2012) monologue about grim working conditions in the Chinese plants that manufacture iPhones and iPads has been adapted, says Daisey, in some 80 different incarnations in six different languages since Daisey offered a transcript of the show for free download on his website 17 months ago. But Timothy Guillot’s version is, as far as Daisey or Guillot or I know, the first attempt to reframe it as a musical. Lauren R. Alexander thought turning Daisey’s solo show into an ensemble piece was a smart move, especially if you’re a fan of the PowerPoint paperclip icon. (But what Apple fanboy/girl would ever cop to that?) Tickets.

Romeo and Juliet (Source, 7:30 p.m.)—-Anybody know what the hell this thing is? Yeah, probably some inscrutable movement-based improvisation based on whalesongs or whatever. Anywho, this production of Shakespeare’s tragic tale of star-crossed lovers is “fresh and visceral” enough to move Rachel Kurzius to review it in verse. Just make sure you pee first, she admonishes, even though the “two hours’ traffic of our stage” have been whittled, in true We Happy Few fashion, to a fleet 90 minutes. Tickets.

Last Train to Nibroc (Fort Fringe – Bedroom, 7:45 p.m.)—-If you’ve had it up to your vagina with monologues wherein performers spill about their sexual insecurities, this sweetly anachronistic two-hander about strangers on a train from playwright Arlene Hutton may be just the thing, reports Maddie Gaw. Tickets.

Smellin’ Up the Den (Goethe Instituit – Gallery, 8:15 p.m.)—-This admirably offensive sketch-comedy show from Red Knight Productions has “the simplistic absurdity of Monty Python sketches like the Ministry of Silly Walks—but with an emphasis on language over physical comedy,” opines Ian Buckwalter. Tickets.

Other shows we haven’t seen yet but that look very promising: Evan Crump’s war drama Body Armor (Gearbox, 8:45 p.m.) and Not a Robot Theatre’s The Clocks (Studio Theatre -Stage 4, 9 p.m.).

Happy Fringing! And remember, people: hydrate, hydrate, hydrate.