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Greeting, Noble Denizens of Planet Fringe. Wanna hear something sexy? When the sun sets over Fort Fringe tonight at 8:25 p.m. Eastern Daylight Time, the temperature is projected to be a humane 72 degrees Fahrenheit.

CapFringe recommendations, courtesy of your friendly neighborhood Fringe & Purge Action News and Commentary Squad, explode in action immediamente!

In Search of the Perfect G-String (Caos on F, 6:15 p.m.)—-Senior FPANCS agent Rachel Mantueffel loved Yvonee Caruthers’ memoir about her life as a cellist, which blends anecdotes and in-character musical performances with grace. “She plays the cello in a way that makes you laugh,” Mantueffel said on the Fringe & PurgeCast, recounting a sequence wherein Caruthers attempts to respond to the very confusing dictates of a domineering conductor, also played by Carruthers. Senior agent Rebecca J. Ritzel also reviewed the show favorably for some test-prep/healthcare/industrial boiler company.

R.U.R. (Rossum’s Universal Robots) (The Shop, 5:45 p.m.)—-Karel Capek’s almost-century-old play asking whether artificial persons (to use the term preferred by Bishop, the benevolent android immortalized on film by Lance Henriksen) are entitled to human dignity remains prophetic despite its technological anachronisms, said the hyper-prolific agentBrett Abelman in his admiring review. “By dealing fairly with the creaky aspects of the original script, co-directors Rachel Murray and Cory Cunningham allow the melodrama to breathe without apologizing for it, and the play’s surprising relevance shines through.”

Fish Outta Water (Warehouse, 8:15 p.m.)—-Ron Litman’s second CapFringe solo show (with musical accompaniment from Tom Pile) has its final currently-scheduled performance tonight. I’ll be there. Litman’s DC Trash was an unexpected but deserving hit at last year’s festival. This prequel to that show, more or less, covers Litman’s years trying to adjust to life in Wisconsin, where he moved after his 2003 divorce to be closer two his children. (Litman, a city mouse, talked about his trouble adjusting to the Midwest on a 2012 episode of the Fringe & PurgeCast; listen to that here.) Litman will also perform a reprise of DC Trash at the Warehouse tomorrow at 6:15 p.m.

No Sex, Please (Gearbox, 8:15 p.m.)—-Storyteller Derek Hills is a FPANCS alum, but able-penned rookie agent Rachel Kurzius doesn’t know him, and she gave his comic monologue about his long-delayed deflowering her stamp of approval. “Hills weaves anecdotes into a worldview that feels cohesive and lush,” she praised. “Most impressively, Hills manages to turn the phrase ‘vaginal secretions’ into a reoccurring laugh line.” Verily, we must all preserve our precious bodily fluids.

Underneath the Lintel (Goethe Institut – Main Stage, 9:30 p.m.)—-Invaluable rookie agent Alexis “Hudson” Hauk went full rave for playwright Glen Berger’s fantasy-tinged 2001 one-hander about a librarian trying to track down a long, long overdue book. It’s directed and performed by the “luminous” Pat O’Brien. “If only Fringe were longer, I’d go back a few more times,” says the usually cool and reserved Hauk. “But I’d rather you claim my seat.” Claim it.

Kubrilesque (GALA Hispantic Theatre, 12:15 a.m.)—-Burlesque artist Crystal Swarovski’s much-tweaked, constantly-evolving tribute to the filmograpy of Stanley Kubrick was probably the show for which I felt the most anticipation into this year’s festival. I haven’t made it yet, and Agent Hauk wasn’t impressed, but I’m still sufficiently intrigued to check it out. All work and no play makes Chris a dull boy, after all.

The Continuing Adventures of John Blade, Super Spy; Last Train to Nibroc; H Street Houswives; Violent Delights: A Shakespearean Brawl-esque Sideshow; Body Armor; I Tried to Be Normal, It Didn’t Take; 43 ½: The Greatest Deaths of Shakespeare’s Tragedies

Kubrilesque and Fish Outta Water photos by Paul Gillis, courtesy Capital Fringe.