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One burger joint’s burglary is another’s shameless/questionable publicity stunt. After video of a man sneaking into a Five Guys in Columbia Heights and making himself a burger became a viral sensation (#hamburglar), Wayback Burgers has offered the alleged criminal “a year of free burgers” if he turns himself in.

“We think he chose the wrong burger,” says Wayback Burgers President John Eucalitto, who quickly backtracks to say “not that we would want him to do it to us” and “we think actions like this are wrong.”

The hamburglar should note there is some fine print. Eucalitto first said he’d offer the alleged thief one burger per month for a year. When I noted that 12 burgers hardly seems like a year’s supply, Eucalitto upped the offer to one per week.

“We can give him the Triple Triple,” Eucalitto says, referring to a burger with nine patties and nine pieces of cheese. “That should be more than enough to keep him full and satisfy his cravings so he doesn’t do it again.”

(You’re welcome, hamburglar.)

The other catch to this gimmick is that the Connecticut-based burger chain’s closest location to D.C. is in Ashburn, Va. Wayback Burgers is also opening a location inside the Washington Navy Yard military base in July, but as Eucalitto notes, “If he has a record, I don’t think he’s not going to be able to go there.”

That’s not to say the hamburglar won’t have options to redeem his burger deal: “By the time he does his time, we’ll have more restaurants open,” Eucalitto says.