The shadiest, oddest, and most obfuscatory things D.C. politicos have said recently:

• “Half my colleagues think they are on the D.C. student council. The council has changed. Many members are liberal lefties, from the Bernie Sanders, socialist wing of the [Democratic] party.” —Ward 2 Councilmember Jack Evans, the longest-serving current councilmember, on his peers. [Current]

• “How many Metro employees does it take to change a light bulb? None. We don’t change light bulbs at Metro.” —Evans, who also chairs Metro’s board. [ibid]

• “There are people who are urging me to run as an Independent. … I’m happy with what I’m doing right now.” —Ward 7 Councilmember Vince Gray on potentially running for mayor again. [Kojo]

• “In our first term, we jump-started education reform—and DC is now the fastest improving school district in the nation.” —Mayor Muriel Bowser plugging her re-election campaign. Fact-check! [Twitter]

• “Boy, you know what, D.C., if you wanted to get rid of me, this wasn’t the year to do it!” —D.C. Delegate Eleanor Holmes Norton, who faces a challenger in former Obama administration staffer Kim Ford. (Norton reportedly said this while “sipping a cup of green tea with lemon.”) [Post]

• “Literally everyone in the building is appalled by him being in Cabo.” —D.C. Council staffer on Ward 8 Councilmember Trayon White‘s absence from a key vote on the District’s fiscal year 2019 budget. [WCP]

• “I’ve never had a more intractable nut to crack than rent concessions.” —D.C. Council committee director on a misleading rent-control practice that’s common in the District. [WCP]

• “The posters on trees have been removed.” —Ward 1 D.C. Council candidate Sheika Reid on her campaign posters that were affixed to trees. [Twitter]

• “Some people think Jim Graham is still councilmember.” —Ward 1 D.C. Council candidate Kent Boese, who along with Reid and a few others, is running against incumbent Brianne Nadeau. Graham died last June. [Twitter]

• “The things people care about the most are the things that impact their lives. And for those who have pets and dogs in particular, this space is really important and special.” —Nadeau on a popular dog park in Columbia Heights that sits on Metro-owned land. Metro may sell the land, but D.C. has set aside funds to buy it. [WJLA]

• “Seriously, it was a pic of me getting in a uber … not a getaway car. This is so silly.” —At-Large D.C. Council candidate Jeremiah Lowery doubles down on denial of allegedly trashing one of his opponent’s campaign signs. [Twitter, WCP]

• “Perhaps this explains what happened to a few of my signs.” —At-Large D.C. Councilmember Anita Bonds, who is seeking re-election in the June Democratic primary. [Twitter]