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When I stopped dealing dope to kids and started working as a journalist, Mom began referring to my brother John as her only child, my girlfriend told her family that I’d been hit by a bus, and my landlord insisted I pay the rent in cash. At “Why Does Everyone Hate Us?,” reporters from the Washington Post and the Chicago Tribune will wring their hands, bemoan the plight of the fourth estate, and undoubtedly conclude that journalism is just too darn mean. Rotten eggs will be confiscated at the door. At 7:30 p.m. at the American University’s Kay Spiritual Life Center Chapel, 4400 Massachusetts Ave. NW. FREE. (202) 885-2074. (DP)