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Advice to poetasters: you want to be a pair of claws scuttling across the bottom of some ancient sea, better stay the hell away from poetry slams, where versifiers vie like tough-man competitors, going couplet to couplet until there’s only one left standing. In such a setting, a twee metaphor is likely to snap under the pressure of a double suplex. Tonight’s Poetry Slam kicks off at 7:45 p.m. at 15 Minutes, 1030 15th St. NW. $3. (202) 408-1855. (MD)