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I confess to having been curious for years about these “massage parties,” but for the life of me, I can’t figure out the point of this schizophrenic piece (“The Naked City,” 5/9).

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At first, John Cloud is moralistic and preachy, but a minute later he’s just kind of pissy about the brand of beer, bitchy about the age and waistlines of the attendees, and sniffy about the unacceptable towels. He’s dying to print last names and expose people, but he is also regretful that his article could result in city inspections and possibly in getting the parties shut down. Cloud is horny, but he doesn’t want anyone patting his butt as he walks up and down the stairs. He likes “a little sleaze,” but he wants “a slightly more appealing incarnation”.

By the time we are told that Cloud does not plan to attend more parties, we have already figured out it’s not because the parties are dangerous or a threat to the neighborhood—it’s just because the physical attributes of the guys who go to the parties aren’t up to Cloud’s standards.

Thanks, City Paper, for this incisive reporting!

Logan Circle

via the Internet