The Damage Done:

Gen. Julius Becton announces D.C. schools will open three weeks late. Mayor Barry, seizing on one of few powers he has left, announces that rec programs will be extended. -10

Celebrated restaurateur Duke Zeibert dies, joins Jack Kent Cooke, Edward Bennett Williams for cocktails and lousy burgers at great restaurant in sky. -2

Canal Road water-main break halts traffic for days. Locals petition to open C&O Canal to commuter traffic. -3

Rabid fox bites infant in Fairfax County subdivision; Virginia Rep. Tom Davis blames D.C. for exporting culture of violence to suburbs. -1

In letter to President Clinton, Ward 7 Councilmember Kevin Chavous voices opposition to D.C. rescue package: “I employ you to veto this legislation.” -4

Appellate judges reject appeal by D.C. schools to hold classes while crews work on roofs; fire breaks out in one of the buildings a week later. -6

Heralded Redskins wide receiver Michael Westbrook sucker-punches teammate in practice, serves suspension as football coach at Marcus Garvey Public Charter School. -2

Congress passes law hiking fines for protesters who block bridges into D.C.; home rule activists plot demonstration at Dunn Loring Kiss & Ride. -2

SAT scores for D.C. public school students drop 10 points. “Things are better than we thought,” proclaims schools official. -1

Subtotal: -31

Shots in the Arm:

Judge convicts Mary Anigbo, principal of Marcus Garvey Public Charter School, of assaulting Washington Times reporter. Anigbo invokes Jesus Christ and says she was bum-rushed by Pharisees. +5

Eighty-four congressmen give D.C. students internships during school-opening delay. D.C. congressional Delegate Eleanor Holmes Norton declares victory for home rule. +1

Six hundred activists picket North Carolina home of Sen. Lauch Faircloth. Faircloth swings back with incomprehensible Op-Ed in Post. +5

Thousands of unemployed D.C. residents flood job fair for positions at MCI Center. “Wizards aren’t going to win it all with this kind of recruitment strategy,” proclaims sports pundit. +3

Cabdriver sues police who arrested him after he booed Mayor Barry;

Hizzoner offers settlement deal, including tennis lessons and limo ride with Ted Koppel. +2

EPA announces plan to improve D.C. water quality; Agriculture Department announces plan to make pigs fly. +3

C-SPAN buys out Jazz 90 (WDCU-FM); Sen. Strom Thurmond promises bebop solos during filibusters. +2

Parties reach settlement in Georgetown cogeneration dispute, ending decadelong community battle. Plans for giant windmill powered by neighborhood activists are announced. +5

cd Subtotal: +26