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Dear John, it’s not working out between us. I know today is Valentine’s Day and everything, but let’s face it: We’re just not right for each other. Now, I know we’re not actually dating yet, but I think we’d better nip this one in the bud. Before we both get hurt. Look at the facts: I’m a high-maintenance, emotionally needy, codependent romantic. You’re a distant, emotionally jaded, independent commitmentphobe—and you’ve slept with more women than I’ve ever shaken hands with. But I do like you. So if you come with me to “Love…Lust…and Longing: Relationships in the 21st Century,” and you manage to sit through all four speakers (including Mrs. and Mr. Cokie Roberts and Deborah Tannen, author of You Just Don’t Understand: Women and Men in Conversation) without making any wisecracks, I might reconsider. By the way, my favorite flowers are pink tulips. Love, Amanda. At 11:30 a.m. at the Four Seasons Hotel, 2800 Pennsylvania Ave. NW. $40. For reservations call Women of Washington Inc. at (202) 296-5922. (Amanda Fazzone)