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Let’s say you’ve been playing golf for years, but you still really suck (like me). You try swinging faster, you try swinging slower, you even try playing an entire round with a 7-iron (me, me, me)—yet the closest you’ve come to breaking the century mark is when it started to downpour after 12 holes at Hains Point. Perhaps your best bet—besides abandoning the links and watching more network television (Becker + cough syrup = magic)—would be a Zen approach. Putting naked. Drop-kicking tee shots. Or maybe even taking part in the Firefly Open, in which you get to play Burke Lake Golf Course after the sun goes down. Golfers—armed only with clubs, glowing balls, and flashlights—will play a nine-hole scramble tournament with little idea of where flags, trees, or vicious gophers are. Then again, you could always just go to Rock Creek Park and cheat like hell (don’t look at me). At 6:30 p.m. at the Burke Lake Golf Course, 7315 Ox Road, Fairfax Station. $20. For reservations call (703) 323-1641. (Sean Daly)