TO JULY 22

Dear Marge: How is Palm Beach? Walt and I will be down over Thanksgiving, so save our spots at bingo! Things here in Largo are fine, thanks. My grandson Marty—the dermatologist—took me into Washington to go to the theater last week. Isn’t that sweet? He’s such a good grandson. (And a good doctor, too!) Anyway, Marty took me to Zombie Attack!, which he says is a hit with the young people. He also told me the theater company is very experimental. Let me tell you, Margie, he wasn’t kidding! Now, I love my grandson—even if he is dating that shiksa—and if I could see him through potty training, I can see him through this “experimental theater” phase of his. Margie, they were spewing blood—on the audience! There was even nudity—right in front of everyone! Oh, it made me blush that Marty should be exposed to this. Apparently young people define “flesh-starved zombies” a little differently than we did when we were young. These undead were sex-starved—and they ripped off their victims’ clothes! And the theater wasn’t even a theater—it was really a rock club. I should have worn earplugs! There’s only so much screaming my old ears can take. Oy, kids today! Kisses to you and Paul. See you in November! Yours, Jessie. Zombie Attack! is performed at 8 p.m. Thursday to Saturday, to Saturday, July 22, at the Metro Cafe, 1522 14th St. NW. $10-$15. (202) 675-3071. (Jessica Dawson)