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SUNDAY

What’s the most popular soap opera on television? The Young and the Restless pulled in 8 million viewers recently, but I’d argue that its ass is kicked by the World Wrestling Federation. Each Monday night, 8.9 million adolescent boys and I tune in to Raw Is War to catch up on the continuing drama of the Rock (pictured), the Dudleys—D-Von and Buh-Buh Ray—Chyna, and, of course, the McMahon Family Players. One current story line has World Wrestling Federation Enterprises Chair Vince McMahon’s daughter, Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley, experiencing marital difficulties with her “husband,” former WWF champion Triple H. Stephanie married him partly to get revenge on Vince for having the Undertaker kidnap her and stage a mock wedding in order—I forget exactly how—to screw his archenemy, Stone Cold Steve Austin. I guess you had to see it with the punching. Although my wrestling obsession is an embarrassment to my family, my mother says I come by it honestly. When they were dating, she and my dad took his grandmother to see All-Star Wrestling, and Mom was mortified to hear that frail-looking woman scream in her thick Swedish accent, “Rip his arm off and beat him over the head with the bloody stump!” And who knows, maybe the old gal even enjoyed checking out the packages, as I do. A disclaimer: One of the pillars of the Hopf financial empire is WWFE stock. Come see my employees beat the crap out of each other Sunday at 7 p.m. Sunday, Aug. 6, at the MCI Center, 601 F St. NW. $18-$40. (202) 432-7328. (Janet Hopf)