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18

WEDNESDAY

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Will Ronnie Mervis entertain us with tales from his latest romp into the center of the Earth at tonight’s diamond-education evening at Mervis Diamond Importers? One can only cross her fingers and hope. After all, Ronnie’s a busy precious-gems purveyor. He’s got to practice saying, “I’m Ronnie Muhh-vus,” for his commercials on WTOP and answer phone calls to 1-800-HER-LOVE from desperate men buying tennis bracelets. And then there’s that pesky little matter of tunneling deep below the Earth’s surface, risking cave-ins and lung disease, to hand-pick diamonds with just the right color and clarity. Wait, my bad—that last one’s the job of Ronnie’s brother, Zed, who seems strangely silent on any Mervis Diamond Importers ad. Ronnie will provide the diamonds as well as complimentary cocktails and hors d’oeuvres, and you’ll bring the questions and your Rich Little-best Muhh-vus impersonation at 6:30 p.m. at Mervis Diamond Importers, 1900 Mervis Way, Tysons Corner. Free. (703) 448-9000, ext. 143. (Elissa Silverman)