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When the 60-second trailer for something called Corky Romano starring Chris Kattan gets more laughs than the entire feature it accompanies, that’s one damn bad movie you’ve wasted your money on. And Say It Isn’t So, produced by the Farrelly brothers—never known for their lofty humor yet inarguably capable of recognizing a worthy script—is hands-down one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. Now, I like sister-fucker jokes as much as the next gal….Seriously, does anyone really find this subject funny? Chris Klein stars as dumb, schmucky, say-he-isn’t-the-lead Gilly, an animal-control specialist who finds the woman of his dreams in Jo (Heather Graham). Like all the other men in the neighborhood, Gilly meets Jo when he goes to her beauty salon and gets a disastrous haircut. (But here’s where the laff riot starts: She stabs him in the cheek! Ha, ha! Then she cuts off his ear!) Shortly after they fall in love and decide to get married, orphaned Gilly receives bad news: Yep, she’s his sister—or is she? Before the mess is straightened out, and despite the fact that neither Gilly nor Jo were aware of their alleged family ties, every possible incest-related and not-close-to-being-funny insult is thrown at them from the barnyard sophisticates of their small Indiana town. There’s a whole lot of amputee and stroke-victim humor, too, and the place that Jo runs off to in an attempt to escape her shame is Beaver, Ore.! With the late-in-the-film introduction of a slew of beaver jokes, it feels as if the writers officially gave up on trying to flog laughs from this dead horse. (Advice for future projects: Sometimes, a well-placed yo-momma joke can work wonders. See Saturday Night Live’s Jeopardy! parodies for examples.) Nary a chuckle could be heard from the usually ever-giggling teenagers who made up the majority of Say It Isn’t So’s audience. It’s clearly time for the Farrellys to start scraping together some bells and whistles for the DVD. —Tricia Olszewski