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24

TUESDAY

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When Betty Blowtorch’s new LP, Are You Man Enough, landed on my desk, I was charmed by the eloquent song titles listed on its jewel case: “I’m Ugly and I Don’t Know Why,” “Shut Up and Fuck,” “Big Hair, Broken Heart.” They seemed to be the kind of songs that the Donnas would have written if they’d been Linda Blair’s cellmates in Chained Heat. Then I played it. Pure sonic drivel. The promising “Big Hair, Broken Heart” was a horrific paean to ’80s hair bands: “Where did those hair bands go?” (They’re on tour this summer, ladies. You’re probably opening for them.) And how do you fuck up a song with the damn-near-foolproof title “Rock ‘N Roll 69?” And when you find out that the disc’s highlight is a Vanilla Ice cameo (on “Size Queen”), the thoughts of how fast you could melt this disc with a real blowtorch will undoubtedly quickly race to mind. Betty flames out with French Kicks at 9 p.m. at the Black Cat, 1831 14th St. NW. $5. (202) 667-7960. (Richard Byrne)