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Pity poor Wes Bentley. The release date of Soul Survivors has been delayed so many times that it’s unclear whether he made it before or after his star turn in American Beauty. Either way, his agent should have worked harder to get this Steve Carpenter-directed horror stinker deep-sixed. What little plot there is begins with a car accident: Four high school friends—Matt (Bentley), Sean (Casey Affleck), Cassie (Melissa Sagemiller), and Annabel (Eliza Dushku, so good in Bring It On but wasted here)—are out partying one last time before they go their separate ways. Cassie is in love with Sean (and who wouldn’t be?), but she once dated Matt, who is now sorta seeing Annabel, but not really, because he still has a thing for Cassie. Don’t worry if you don’t get it, because everyone’s been drinking, it’s raining heavily, there’s a head-on collision with another car, and—oh, shit!—Sean dies. Everyone’s appropriately upset, but then the cutie-patootie starts appearing to Cassie and professing his undying love for her. Carpenter’s “mystery” “intensifies” when strange masked figures—y’know, like the ones from Jacob’s Ladder—start haunting Cassie, too, and she and Annabel take a shower together. Plainly, Carpenter wants us to wonder, Did Sean really die in the crash? And, more important, Did the others really survive? If this sounds at all interesting, know that it’s really not. (Well, actually, the shower scene is. And have I mentioned how cute Affleck is?) After Carpenter throws in Luke Wilson as a priest who comforts Cassie with such profundities as “You feel alone in a world you don’t understand,” you’ll quickly realize that the only person who’s truly dead is you, dear viewer. —Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa