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In: Palisades

Residents are opposing: The D.C. Department of Public Works

Because: Granite curbs are threatening neighborhood oak trees.

We Say: Tree-hugging is hard enough without scuffing your shoes.

In: Foggy Bottom

Residents are opposing: A new building for George Washington University’s international relations program

Because: It would bring more students into the neighborhood.

We Say: A great iron curtain has descended on Foggy Bottom.

In: Spring Valley and AU Park

Residents are opposing: The U.S. Army Corps of Engineers

Because: The corps lacks the money to remove arsenic from neighborhood yards.

We Say: The corps lacks the will to bulldoze the neighborhood into a wetlands sanctuary.

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In: Glover Park

Residents are opposing: Outsiders

Because: They take up parking spaces.

We Say: Glover Don’t Park.

In: Mount Pleasant

Residents are opposing: Shelters for at-risk youth

Because: The neighborhood, they say, is already saturated with youth shelters.

We Say: Umm, those are hipsters in group houses. —Dave Nuttycombe