It was the kiss of death for sadcore singer-songwriter Hayden Desser when Jerry Seinfeld declared that Hayden’s major-label debut, Everything I Long For, was the comedian’s favorite recording of 1996. Seinfeld might be a brilliant comedian, but tastemaker? Please. Ol’ Jer—of the frizzy mullet, clunky white sneakers, and package-hugging jeans—wouldn’t know cool if it frostbit him on the ass. Despite many publications’—not to mention the funny boy’s—praise of the disc, the accolades didn’t translate into sales, and Hayden’s 1998 follow-up, The Closer I Get, fared even worse. Now, Hayden is back on an indie (Badman), where he belongs, delivering depressing, pretty, lo-fi, Sebadoh/Nick Drake laments: His new CD, Skyscraper National Park, is an 11-song collection as bleak as a Seinfeld spinoff. See if Jerry shows when Hayden plays at 8:30 p.m. at the Metro Cafe, 1522 14th St. NW. $10. (202) 588-9118. (Christopher Porter)