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Hit the bar, buy some cigarettes, drink cheap beer: That’s my No. 1 bit of advice for you aspiring travel writers looking for a little guidance. I don’t care if you’re reviewing a B&B or boating to Barbados or visiting the Land of Little Horses, the best way to commence learning about your assigned destination is to knock ’em back with the locals. You can do all the research you want, flipping through Fodor’s guides and studying Rand McNally maps. But you’ll never capture the true vibe of a place until you buy a round for that surly bastard at the end of the bar—yeah, I know, he’s scary, and a good flossing couldn’t hurt—and get him talking about how his pal Crazy Larry once mooned the mayor. Only then can you begin busting out those luscious adjectives—and start abusing that expense account. Train early, and bring a six-pack, when “Travel Writing for Fun and Profit” begins at 7 p.m. at First Class Inc., 1726 20th St. NW. $37. For reservations call (202) 797-5102. (SD)