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In: Palisades

Residents are opposing: A developer’s resubmitted renovation plan for the Chain Bridge Road Schoolhouse

Because: “They went from a classicist to a romanticist” design.*

We Say: Only narcissist designs are permitted in Palisades.

In: Cleveland Park

Residents are opposing: Aggressive raccoons

Because: They’re “making mincemeat out of my garden.”**

We Say: Time for a zoning variance!

In: Downtown

Residents are opposing: The Ascot restaurant’s attempts to stay open ’til 4 a.m. on Sunday

Because: Revelers make noise late at night and crowd sidewalks.

We Say: We’re at war—midnight curfew!

In: Tenleytown

Residents are opposing: Mattress retailers

Because: They’d rather have antique shops and bookstores.

We Say: Take Connecticut Avenue north to Kensington.

In: Cleveland Park

Residents are opposing: City government

Because: They say workers are slow to dispose of bird carcasses that might carry West Nile virus.

We Say: Cardboard, newspapers, glass, plastic—yes. Biscotti wrappers, dead birds—no.

*As told to the Dupont Current

**As told to a Cleveland Park e-mail forum