There’s still time to nominate local icons for Best of D.C.
1. There was a man of the Checkbook, named Snyder, a would-be ruler of the Gridiron:
2. The same came to Gibbs by night, and said unto him, Joe, we know that thou art a Coach come from God: for no man can do these miracles that thou doest, except God be with him.
3. Gibbs answered and said unto him, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be a winner again, he cannot see the kingdom of the Super Bowl.
4. Snyder said unto him, How can a man be a winner when he has more money than sense? Can he enter the fifth time into his mother’s stadium, and be a winner?
5. Gibbs answered, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born of football and the stadium—and maybe of the NASCAR track as well—he cannot enter into the stadium of God.
6. That which is born of the football is football; and that which is born of the stadium is stadium.
7. Marvel not that I said unto thee, Ye must be born again.
8. The Counter-Trey rusheth where it rusheth, and thou feelest the force thereof, but canst not tell whence it cometh, and whither it goeth: so is every one that is born of the Stadium.
9. Snyder answered and said unto him, How can these things be?
10. Gibbs answered and said unto him, Art thou a master of an NFL team, and knowest not these things?
11. Verily, verily, I say unto thee, We speak that we do know, and testify that we have seen; and thou receivest not one Playoff.
12. If I have told you Preseason things, and thou believest not, how shalt thou believe, if I tell thee [of] Postseason things?
13. And no man hath ascended up to the Super Bowl, but he that came down from the Super Bowl, [even] Gibbs, which is in heaven.
14. And as Riggins dragged along the Dolphins, even so must Washington be dragged along.
15. That whosoever believeth in Gibbs should not perish, but have eternal victory.
16. For Gibbs so loved Washington that he gave his misbegotten Team, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting playoffs. —Dave Nuttycombe