In: Georgetown

Residents Are Opposing: A repaving project on O and P Streets

Because: It’s removing historic cable-car tracks.

We Say: Don’t touch that pothole—Sally Quinn broke her heel there in 1983.

In: Brightwood

Residents Are Opposing: A convenience store

Because: It sells single cigarettes to local schoolchildren.

We Say: Whatever you do, don’t get into a car with Joe Camel.

In: Petworth

Residents Are Opposing: Street sweepers

Because: They move too fast to actually pick up any trash.

We Say: If I get this baby up to 88 mph, I can get the garbage from last week.

In: Burleith

Residents Are Opposing: A new house on R Street

Because: It’s just too massive.

We Say: Your house is so big, it went to Sizzler and got a group discount.

In: Bloomingdale

Residents Are Opposing: Illegal curb cuts

Because: One resident uses his for a car-stereo installation shop.

We Say: At least it’s not as messy as the horse-stereo installation shop. —Josh Levin