In: Brookland

Residents Are Opposing: A new bridge on Taylor Street NE

Because: Construction will require the closing of Puerto Rico Avenue NE.

We Say: This would never happen if Puerto Rico had a shadow senator.

In: Capitol View

Residents Are Opposing: U6 Metrobuses

Because: The oversized vehicles shake houses on 50th Street NE.

We Say: If you add shock absorbers, the bus will explode.

In: Adams Morgan

Residents Are Opposing: A new Harris Teeter supermarket

Because: Liquor license + big supermarket = big traffic.

We Say: What’s this about a big Teeter?

In: Greenway

Residents Are Opposing: Greater Deliverance Church of God in Christ

Because: The pastor parks his Rolls-Royce on the sidewalk.

We Say: Well, the Lord wouldn’t buy him a Mercedes-Benz.

In: Barnaby Woods

Residents Are Opposing: Knollwood Military Retirement Home

Because: Expansion of the “dementia unit” will dwarf neighboring homes.

We Say: Architects plead insanity at zoning-board meeting. —Josh Levin