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An increasing number of women are learning that, the unfeeling Paul Simon be damned, there is a more delicate way to leave your lover: Just purl a stitch, bitch. According to Debbie Stoller’s Stitch ’n’ Bitch: The Knitter’s Handbook, it is widely believed among the burgeoning clusters of young, hip knitters that crafting a sweater for one’s beau “guarantees that the relationship will end.” Stoller’s advice to freshman stitchers goes beyond the romantic, of course, with illustrated, pun-laden lessons on basic techniques (“The Knitty-Gritty”), how to become involved in virtual knitting communities (“The Inter-Knit”), and tips on starting a sewing circle of your own (“Stay Regular With Fiber”). But don’t get frustrated if you can’t master the Ribbed-for-Her-Pleasure Scarf right away: “Knitting is probably not as easy as you think,” Stoller says, “so be prepared to do a lot more bitching than stitching before you’re really in the loop.” Get your knit on with Stoller at 7 p.m. at Politics and Prose, 5015 Connecticut Ave. NW. Free. (202) 364-1919. (Tricia Olszewski)