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Folks in public housing for senior citizens enjoy one amenity that the residents of standard public housing don’t: They can keep pets. But now Big Brother wants to know exactly what pets the residents have. Under proposed new rules, the D.C. Housing Authority (DCHA) wants seniors to register their dogs, cats, birds—and fish. For the DCHA, it’s a chance to act like regular landlords, who like to keep track of their tenants’ nonhuman companions. But the rules make no distinction between a 20-gallon aquarium—the largest permissible—and guppies in a cup. Though the rule was inspired by a concern over predatory dogs and incontinent cats, even Goldie gets a number. “We’re concerned about any pet,” says DCHA spokesperson Zachary D. Smith. “Any time a resident has a pet, the management should know, and the residents are aware of that.” —David Morton