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Were callous studio chiefs still brainstorming product to fill company-owned theaters, we’d have many more films like Goin’ Coconuts, the 1978 Donny and Marie vehicle. Alas, now actors and directors master their own careers, and intentional fluff such as this “semi-musical” caper comedy is too rare. Coconuts is a pure hack job: Aimed to cash in on popular TV stars (the Osmond sibs) and filmed in Hawaii (expense-account vacation!), it’s directed by Howard Morris, whose few other film-helming assignments include Who’s Minding the Mint? and With Six You Get Eggroll. A likable television bit player, Morris mostly did cartoon voices (Flem on “Cow and Chicken”)—which doesn’t exactly suggest auteur leanings. But at least he had a career, unlike fellow ’nut Harold “Oddjob” Sakata, cast 14 years past his defining Goldfinger role. See Goin’ Coconuts with someone who’s a little bit country, a little bit rock ’n’ roll at 7 p.m. at the Library of Congress’ Mary Pickford Theater, 101 Independence Ave. SE. Free. (202) 707-5677. (Dave Nuttycombe)