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Venue: Four Seasons Garden Terrace Lounge,

2800 Pennsylvania Ave. NW

Item: One “George W. MD” in a parfait glass

Cost: $14 plus tax, plus tip

Herewith, a breakdown of the many politically themed drinks in Washington this election year:

The “George W. MD” is a strong leader—far stronger than its wishy-washy, though equally priced ($14) opponent, the “Kerry Catch Up,” a rather weak and boring tequila slushy. The “W. MD” matches that tequila and raises it—with extra shots of vodka, gin, and rum. Topped off with an exotic spiced tea. Like a warhead. Tipped with depleted uranium.

The “Kerry Berry Kosmo” ($12) at Ritz-Carlton’s Degrees Bar is a juicy blend of Stolis Strasberi and Razberi, cranberry juice, grenadine, and Sprite. Goes great with any ketchup-colored outfit.

Degrees’ “W’tini” ($12) is roughly the same smurfy-colored vodka, curaçao, and Sprite mixture as the “Nader Ade” ($10) at Helix Lounge—except that it’s allied with Russian-made Stoli Oranj, vs. the Nader Ade’s gluten-free French Cirac.

Helix patrons who opt for the fruity “Pink Elephant” or tangy “Disco Donkey” (each $9) are served with plastic-wrapped bubble-gum cigars in patriotic red or blue. Made in Canada.