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Britney is pushing her $50 fragrance, Jessica is selling us $42 edible body cream, and Gwen has the nerve to think somebody’s gonna plunk down $135 for one of her tank tops. Compared with what other celebrities are charging for small, mass-produced pieces of their empires, Alicia Keys’ new Tears for Water: Songbook of Poems and Lyrics, seems like a steal at a mere $19.95. The cynical will dismiss the volume as a way for the singer to turn a profit between albums, but if Keys were in it just for the loot, she’d be hawking braid sheen or the smoky eyeliner she favors—not sharing with the public her “most delicate thoughts.” The poetry can seem a tad melancholy for someone who’s perched on the bench of a custom-made purple piano, and the song lyrics would benefit from Keys’ instrumental accompaniment. But for the most star-struck among us, there are worse places to stick our nose than in a celebrity scribe’s book. Keys signs copies of her book at 7 p.m. at Olsson’s Books & Records, 2111 Wilson Blvd., Arlington. Free. (A limited number of tickets will be available, one per person, on a first-come, first-served basis at the store beginning at 8 a.m.) (703) 525-4227. (Sarah Godfrey)