In: Shepherd Park
Residents Are Opposing: Pornographic e-mails
Because: Spammers could be harvesting addresses from the neighborhood e-mail discussion group.
We Say: A penis cannot be enlarged as a matter of right.
In: Dupont Circle
Residents Are Opposing: A gay bar called the Fab Lounge
Because: It’s too close to a school.
We Say: It’s an “experimental” school.
In: Takoma, D.C.
Residents Are Opposing: The salt used to de-ice sidewalks
Because: It damages the concrete, car paint, and leather shoes.
We Say: Spot had the day off.
In: Adams Morgan
Residents Are Opposing: The sidewalk barrier at 2301 Champlain Street
Because: Construction has disrupted the neighborhood for long enough.
We Say: And take off those unsightly hard hats.
Residents Are Opposing: Loud train horns in the wee hours
Because: “[P]lanes aren’t allowed to fly at that time, but it is perfectly fine for a train to blare its horn constantly.”
We Say: Brookland International Airport demands extended runway hours.