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In: Cleveland Park
Residents Are Opposing: Cars from other neighborhoods
Because: They take up parking spaces.
We Say: First they take our spaces. Then they take our jobs.
In: Shaw
Residents Are Opposing: A proposed charter school on 9th Street NW
Because: All those teenagers might frighten conventioneers.
We Say: I’m taking an elective in elderly-punching.
In: Petworth
Residents Are Opposing: Twice-weekly jam sessions on Shepherd Road NW
Because: “When practice is over, band members congregate in the alley and talk loudly.”
We Say: Conversations are so punk rock.
In: Takoma
Residents Are Opposing: Planes dropping parachuters
Because: They circle overhead and make noise for 20 to 30 minutes at a time.
We Say: That’s the price you pay to play live-action Space Invaders.
In: Tenleytown
Residents Are Opposing: A little girl selling cakes door-to-door
Because: “She never delivered my order.”
We Say: The crumbs lead straight to Livan Hernandez’s car.