There’s still time to nominate local icons for Best of D.C.
I was disappointed to see that Rachel Beckman left one question unanswered: Why did the National Aeronautics and Space Administration give Roosevelt High School $10,000 to build robots?
NASA isn’t in the habit of throwing money away. And, with recent budget cuts, NASA officials have been reduced to lighting their cigarettes with mere $1 bills. Every expenditure for the past several years has been efficiently made toward a single goal: To determine how to facilitate cities in space. When this has been accomplished, the more difficult task of convincing people to go live there will be tackled.
My theory has always been that NASA officials want to get most of the world’s population into space so that they will be the only ones left on Earth; then, they can walk around naked if they feel like it. But where do robots fit in?
As robots become more efficient, they take jobs from the manufacturing sector. Most of the world’s finished goods are produced in Third World nations. If robots replace these workers, millions of people will be unemployed. This will make the job of building cities in space all the more attractive. Once these cities are built, what will motivate the rest of us to populate them? This is where the plan gets diabolical.
The assignment for the high school robot competition was to design a robot capable of shooting baskets. As robot players become more successful, they will be seeded into the ranks of pro basketball players. There will be some resistance at first; however, everyone will change their minds pretty quickly when the Olympics come around and we are the only nation with a human basketball team. The college leagues will fall soon after the pros cave in. Soon, the only basketball players in the world will be robots, putting all human players out of work.
Suddenly, we will have freakishly tall, unemployed, and sexually active athletes walking the streets of franchised cities and college towns. And they will be angry. This, I predict, will be the motivator for people to flee into space. Once these athletes learn how to reproduce asexually, they will grow an army of very tall men and women and assault the mainland. Aeronautic engineers will be defenseless due to the fact that they will be idle and probably naked. We will watch this from space, definitely.
Aside from this lapse in reporting, I found the article informative and interesting. Keep up the good work.