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What if God was one of us? TV asked last week. Well, maybe not God exactly. But it wasn’t hard to see a little of the divine in a roving rabbi who heals families from his Airstream—and a lot of the human in a could-be Catholic priest torn between booty and the Bible. Of course, if God really were one of us, She’d probably play a mean game of foosball: “Who woulda thunk it?” says a friend of the superhuman subject of Commander in Chief. “Mac Allen—queen of the Hartford Arcade, president of the United States!”
God or the Girl
Sunday at 9 p.m.
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“He doesn’t want a girl in my life to overshadow my relationship with God,” says potential seminarian Mike of his overly “protective” mentor, Father Pauselli. But it’s not Mike’s relationship with God that has his girlfriend a little perplexed: “Father Pauselli…gets jealous when I steal [Mike’s] attention,” she says. “So we always joke around that…he just would rather have Michael for himself.”
Sunday at 11:05 p.m.
“I came out of this experience truly with the same perspective,” says white guy Bruno, reflecting on all that he’s learned after five weeks of race-swapping. At least girlfriend Carmen has gained some insight: “Bruno and I wanted to go to Rose’s black-poetry performance [made up] in black because we were her parents, and her parents would obviously be black,” she says wisely.
Shalom in the Home
Monday at 10 p.m.
“For the next week, the Shalom mobile home will be parked in the Gordons’ driveway,” says rabbi/family therapist Shmuley Boteach, observing the warring clan from his trailer’s closed-circuit televisions. And this is one drive-by clergyman who doesn’t miss a thing: “You’re not always loud,” he admonishes the high-decibel Gordon matriarch. “When you speak to your husband romantically, are you loud then?”
Thursday at 8 p.m.
Ah, the sweet smell of near-success: “The actual inspiration for the invention was…my wife,” says devoted husband Brian of his patented Flatulence Deodorizer. “She said, ‘Hon, don’t come over here….I had a smelly episode.’” But it takes more than a touching backstory to win over judge Mary Lou Quinlan: “We just can’t choose the greatest American inventor as the one who invented a fart pad,” she says.
Commander in Chief
Thursday at 10 p.m.
You think Barbara Bush gets nailed like this? “Where the hell have you been?” President Geena Davis badgers her elderly mother, caught doing the walk of shame. Don’t even think about trying to pull a fast one on this leader of the free world: “Remember how I used to always kick your ass at Ms. Pac-Man?” the prez reminds an associate. —Mario Correa