Uber-chef Thomas Keller would lick Michel Richard’s pans clean if he could. José Andrés may be Spain’s best export since Manzanilla olives. And Anthony Bourdain? Well, he’ll probably be best remembered for downing bad mussels, which left him “shitting like a mink.” Bourdain would be the first to admit that his kitchen bona fides look like plonk when compared to the premier-cru accomplishments of Richard and Andrés. But, then again, the D.C. chefs don’t share Bourdain’s ability to strafe their industry with a well-turned phrase. The different paths these men took to stardom—two through kitchens, one through the media—are underscored in the new collection How I Learned to Cook. Richard and Andrés relate nostalgic life lessons about cooking; Bourdain bitches about television studio kitchens. All three chefs will dredge up more of their past during a panel discussion moderated by Saveur’s Colman Andrews at 6:30 p.m. at the U.S. Department of the Interior, 1849 C St. NW. $15. (202) 357-3030. (Tim Carman)