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On Feb. 7 this year, longtime Washington Post columnist Art Buchwald checked into the Washington Home and Hospice expecting, like just about everyone who enters a hospice, not to come out. Buchwald marked his imminent passing with goodbye appearances on The Diane Rehm Show, This Week With George Stephanopoulos, CNN, and Fox News Sunday, as well as in articles by the New York Times, USA Today, and the Post. Death turned out not to be so imminent—five months later, Buchwald checked out, but the death watch continues with Buchwald’s new book, Too Soon to Say Goodbye. It’s a classically Buchwaldian brew of gentle wit; large, well-spaced type; and plenty of boldface names. (Among his deathbed visits: Donald Rumsfeld, the queen of Swaziland, and Carly Simon’s sister.) There are also some delusions of grandeur—he calls himself “the only person who became famous for dying.” Tell Buchwald all about Mattie J.T. Stepanek when he discusses and signs copies of his work at 7 p.m. at the Wesley United Methodist Church, 5312 Connecticut Ave. NW. Free. (202) 364-1919. (Mike DeBonis)