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The life of a Shaolin warrior is one of philosophy, intense training, and spiritual enlightenment. Of course, the real allure is high-flying ass-kickery, the likes of which will hopefully be on prominent display when the Shaolin Warriors bring their kung-fu act to Lisner Auditorium. Because, really, who wants to watch a bunch of monks praying to Buddha or twirling some colorful ribbons around when they could be soaring across the stage, thrusting all manner of spears and staves at one another? The show’s Web site promises that “an attentive audience will gain some understanding of the profoundness of Chinese Buddhism, the Doctrine of ‘Unity of Zen and Martial Arts’ in particular”; the true path to fulfillment, however, will more likely come from seeing real human beings actually pull off some Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragonnesque moves. The performance begins at 2 p.m. at George Washington University’s Lisner Auditorium, 730 21st St. NW. $25n$60. (202) 397-7328.