Sign up for our free newsletter

Free D.C. news, delivered to your inbox daily.

Paula Poundstone’s life is a joke. In 1990, the joke was, “My cats don’t like water.” After Poundstone was arrested in 2001 for driving while intoxicated, the joke was, “I had a little drinking problem.” As the fallout from Poundstone’s DUI subsided—Poundstone lost two foster children as a result of the incident but retained custody of her three adopted kids—the joke became “My cats don’t like alcohol.” Over the next eight years, Poundstone’s run-in with the law found a permanent spot in her autobiographical routine. “I got really drunk one day and went into a pet store and bought a dog,” Poundstone said in an appearance on Letterman. “I have nine cats. Believe me, the cats were hiding the alcohol after that.” Now that Poundstone has settled into a more family-friendly place—she’s spokesperson for the Public Library Association and frequent guest on NPR’s Wait! Wait! Don’t Tell Me!—her life story has presented more opportunity for comedic dissonance. Also, more cat: Poundstone now has 10.

POUNDSTONE PERFORMS AT 7:30 P.M. AT THE BIRCHMERE, 3701 MT. VERNON AVE., ALEXANDRIA. SOLD OUT. (703) 549-7500.