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Does anyone ever win the myriad contests City Paper runs? How does one win? Are the winners listed?

You know, I’m the editor of the paper and I’ve wondered that myself. But for old-school, church-and-state reasons, we editorial staffers don’t have anything to do with those contests.

So I clambered over City Paper’s Chinese wall and asked Heather McAndrews, who runs the promotions. “Someone always wins,” McAndrews says. Why not announce the winners? Easy. There are too many of them. “The movie contests alone have 50 or more winners each.” McAndrews does have a tip on how to win: Just enter. “The winners are picked randomly by a program,” she says. “We put in how many winners and it gives us names. It doesn’t matter when you enter and if you enter more than once the extra entries are not counted.”