Update: This contest runs until Sept. 14. We will illustrate the winning submissions and print them in City Paper in late September. We’ll also tease out themes among the entries and deliver special collections of answers from the responses. 

City Paper, ever eager to understand the people of the District, is launching a new contest. In the spring we asked you to create dioramas made out of Peeps. This fall, we are asking you to tell us what qualities make a person a certified Washingtonian.

To enter, all you have to do to if find the most cutting, accurate, or heartfelt way to finish this sentence:

You are so D.C. if ___________________.

The possibilities are endless, as are your opportunities to enter the contest. Based on the submissions, City Paper will choose a first, second, and third place winner among ten finalists. 

If you’ve got an idea, just fill out the form below. Please include good contact information so we can get in touch with you in advance if you win.

Here are some sample entries to get you thinking:

You are so D.C. if …

  • if you got a D.C. flag tattoo three months into your residency.

  • if you’d rather walk in the pouring rain than take the DC Streetcar.

  • if the cops have been called to your ANC meeting.

  • if you secretly fantasize about getting retroceded.

  • if ‘retrocession’ is your safe word.

Consider these straight-laced starter options as a mere launch pad for your thoughts.