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HO HO WHO:Everybody’s favorite congressman-turned cable news host-turned Trump critic-turned bandleader, Joe Scarborough. In a testament to just how wild this year has been, I completely missed the news that old Morning Joe is planning to release a new EP under the moniker Scarborough each month for the next four years. I decided to try some of Scarborough’s other new wave offerings before diving into the new EP A Very Drumpf Christmas, and I made it through a total of half a song.
CHRISTMAS MORNING JOE:“The Drumpf” is very heavily lifted from “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch,” with a background refrain of “the Drumpf, the Drumpf” reminiscent of “Santa Baby.” Joe does a nasal sort of growl over some jazzy instrumentals, but thankfully, one of his female backup singers takes the reins for most of the vocals. Unfortunately, the lyrics are unintelligible and befuddling. One choice passage goes thusly: “He’s got orange chinchillas/they’re scurrying round his head/they look like hairy Cheetohs/but smell like they’ve been dead.” Is this referring to Trump’s hairpiece? His skin? His weird fingers? It’s impossible to say. Overall, the effect of the song is that of a particularly unfunny editorial cartoon set to music.
I’M DREAMING OF AN AVERAGE WHITE MALE CHRISTMAS: If Scarborough was going for biting political commentary, he wildly missed the mark. In the face of horrifying policy decisions and a total breakdown of American norms, poking fun at Trump’s appearance long ago stopped being funny, and a offhand jokes about deporting reindeers don’t ultimately say much. Maybe the fact that Joe is a rich white man, as well as a former longtime buddy of Trump’s, prevents him from condemning Trump too harshly. Scarborough has somehow fooled the public into believing he’s a liberal folk hero, rather than a smug Republican, but trying to pass himself off as a singer/songwriter is even less convincing.
CHEER FACTOR: 0/10. This is the equivalent of a particularly unfunny and incoherent editorial cartoon set to music. I’d say Joe should stick to politics and cable news, but I don’t think he’s particularly good at those things either.