I’ve got three words for you: Welcome to fall.

(FINALLY.)

LEADING THE MORNING NEWS:

  • Be cautious on your commutes this morning: Parts of the DMV saw intense downpours Thursday evening that left flood warnings and coastal flood advisories in place through the early hours of Friday morning.

  • The Caps lost 6-0 to the New Jersey Devils Thursday night.

  • Bloviator-in-Chief Kanye West didn’t limit himself to just one grandstanding speech on Thursday, in Donald Trump’s West Wing. After a 10-minute tirade that saw him referring to Trump as “bro” and dissecting his own mental health, West stood atop a table at the Georgetown Apple store to give customers an impromptu “keynote” address. “Reality meets reality television,” Republican Senator Jeff Flake reportedly said upon watching a video of the stunt.

  • More on the aggressive clean energy bill Ward 3 Councilmember Mary Cheh introduced to the D.C. Council, and its possible effects on lower-income Washingtonians.

THE BULLETIN:

  • Missed connection: “The guy that stole my towel while I showered (WSC DuPont). Showering after workout today and someone stole my towel. Why’d you do it?”  [craigslist]

  • Gear Prudence: What’s up with all the stripped bike frames on the street? [WCP]

LOOSE LIPS LINKS, by Morgan Baskin (tips? mbaskin@washingtoncitypaper.com)

  • ICYMI: The troubling opacity of D.C.’s master facilities plan. [WCP]

  • Ward 5 Councilmember Kenyan McDuffie introduces an emergency bill to clarify the city’s role when hospitals announce they’re shuttering services. [Twitter]

  • Mayor Muriel Bowser makes an appearance at Wednesday’s At-Large Council debate. [WAMU]

YOUNG & HUNGRY LINKS, by Laura Hayes (tips? lhayes@washingtoncitypaper.com)

  • All the island-inspired bar food you can think of at Tiki TNT. [WCP]

  • A generous happy hour with lobster deviled eggs and classic cocktails. [WCP]

  • Tom Sietsema’s full fall dining guide is here including regional hall-of-famers. [Post]

  • A look ahead at the region’s coming-soon food halls. [Washingtonian]

  • In case you missed this classic salad, it’s back. [DC Refined]

  • One of the biggest scandals in wine, explained. [Eater]

ARTS LINKS, by Matt Cohen (tips? mcohen@washingtoncitypaper.com)

  • Washington National Opera gives La traviata a cinematic feel. [WCP]

  • D.C.’s newest museum puts you in the shoes of police officers. [Post]

  • Shakespeare Theatre Company turns the comedy of errors into a song and dance extravaganza. [WCP]

  • Get to know Second Assembly, a new collective for queer women of color. [DCist]

  • Yes, there’s an actual West Wing convention and—shocker—it took place in Bethesda. [Washingtonian]

  • First Man is an artful look at the Apollo 11 moon landing. [WCP]

  • Tati Pastukhova, the Managing Director & Founder of ARTECHOUSE, talks about the gallery’s latest exhibition. [BYT]

HOUSING COMPLEX LINKS, by Morgan Baskin (tips? mbaskin@washingtoncitypaper.com)

  • ICYMI: Edgewood residents fight eviction from the Catholic church with the help of Catholic neighbors. [WCP]

  • A weekly roundup of off-market homes. [PoPville]

  • 34 families are still living at D.C. General. [DCist]

SPORTS LINKS, by Kelyn Soong (tips? ksoong@washingtoncitypaper.com)

  • John Wall loves SoulCycle. “It’s really tough,” he told NBC Sports Washington. “You’ve gotta think. Bro, you’re going 30 minutes hard. It’s a challenge for me.

  • Capitals players’ attempts to give pucks to kids keep getting intercepted by adults. [USA Today]

  • Elena Delle Donne joined Uninterrupted chief executive Maverick Carter to talk about the gender wage gap, her off-court interests, and her sister, Lizzie. [Washington Times]

HAPPENING TODAY, by Kayla Randall (tips? krandall@washingtoncitypaper.com)

OFFICE OF FUTURE PLANNING

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